Homeland Security to Murkowski: Go Fly a Kite

The federal Department of Homeland Security has rejected Gov. Frank Murkowski's request to use $2 million in federal money to buy a corporate-style jet.

According to KTUU, Homeland Security gives three reasons for the rejection:

1. The jet would not be primarily used for homeland security purposes.

2. The jet could not land on many bush runways.

3. The jet would not be outfitted with the equipment necessary to prevent or mitigate a terrorist act.

The administration has to concede that the first two points have some validity, but I would really like to see Murkowski argue that a burled walnut minibar stocked with ample supplies of single-malt Scotch can come in mighty handy when you have to battle Al-Qaeda terrorists holed up in some cave near Tok.